Excerpt: Holo-Data Files of MiB HQ: Part Two

[k_in_black]

MiB HQ: Conference Room Alpha-Prime, 1800 hrs
Mission Briefing: Operation Black Oil (Class Omega), Final Report

Following part one.

[Agent J:] I don’t know what kicked my ass last week, but it sure wasn’t any ‘fictional phenomenon.’

[Agent B:] With respect, Agent J, we believe it was. Or at least, the Black Oil started out that way. As a fictional phenomenon on several worlds. And, uh, by the way, it looks like we started out that way too.

[Agent B temporarily drowned out by shouts and bellowing]

[Shouts and bellowing die down]

[Agent K:] Quiet down, people. B’s got that right.

[Agent Zed:] He does. K’s had confirmed contact in Milliways with several individuals that are considered fictional on our world but are living and breathing people on alternate worlds. So it only makes sense that MiB is a fictional organization on some Earths. But, dammit, B, I still don't see--.

[Agent B:] It’s directly relevant, Chief. Allow me to move to our next exhibit:

[Agent B nods at the screen again, and this time an odd theme song and opening credits sequence begins.]

[Agent L:] What’s this? Some kind of failed tv pilot?

[Agent B:] Yes, on our Earth and some others. But on several alternate Earths, the “X-Files” was a successful television series. On a few, it became a pop culture phenomenon.

[Agent K:] Hang on. That’s--.

[Agent B:] Yes, Fox Mulder. And Dana Scully.

[Agent K:] So this is where the Black Oil first came from?

[Agent B:] As a fictional concept, yes. Agents Y and T were the first to stumble across this program during our trans-dimensional sweep for Black Oil manifestations on alternate Earths.

I don’t think we’d have known what to do with this intel, though, if it hadn’t been for K’s reports about Milliways. Once we’d secured dvds of the entire series and brought them back here for analysis, we went back to what we knew about Milliways and the bar’s easy access to multiple worlds, universes and realities. Then we had to consider the way the bar’s patrons--even people from contradictory worlds--are able to interact freely so long as they’re within the bar’s pocket dimension.

It took us several months to put all this together--.

[Agent Zed:] --several months and about a dozen psych exams--.

[Agent B:] Yes, sir. Those little orange tablets were really—ahem.

…As I was saying, we needed the Milliways piece to help us make sense of what it was we were seeing. But we think we have a working model to go with now, and that’s what I’m going to present to you.

[B nods and a holographic schematic comes into view.]

This is a massively simplified version of what we actually found, but we've divided all known alternate Earths into the following broad categories:

MiB: fictional -------- Black Oil: fictional
MiB: real ------------ Black Oil: fictional
MiB: real ------------ Black Oil: real
MiB fictional --------- Black Oil: real

[Agent J:] Aw, damn. I do NOT like where this is going….

[Agent Zed:] For once, kid, I agree with you.


[To be continued...]